Friday, April 22, 2005

If I pray hard enough will Jesus write my thesis?

I have been a bit stressed lately and a friend of mine suggested that I “Pray to God for guidance”. Apparently things weren’t going too well in his life so he said a few prayers and voila; he awoke the next day to a job offer. I wish I could believe that I could “hand all my problems over” to the J-man and kick back and wait for the good times to roll. There have been a few times in my life when I was worried about a big test or making that last payment and I said a quick prayer to hedge my bets. Strangely though, not much happened until I started praying with my head in a book or by writing a prayer down in the form of my signature on a check. In reality if I’m going to ask God to perform some miracle on my behalf via his omnipotence I’m definitely asking for something big. I’m going straight for X-ray vision, laser beam eyeballs, or the ability to read minds. That way on the off chance he does decide to fulfill my wish I will have hit the jackpot. On second thought, I can think of something I need more and won't so obviously contravene the laws of physics. God, if you're reading this and aren't too busy increasing the penis size of some fat rich kid in Kuala Lampur I'm hereby saying a prayer for a completed thesis. You can just put it on my desk....


Blogger theyellowwallpaper said...

I love it! I can't tell you how many times I felt that way as well. Lately, with all the talk about faith and prayer in the news, Jesus is becoming more than just a miracle worker, but a political pundit. I wonder where the "J-man" will turn up next?

12:23 AM  

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